Confronting the sorrow of losing you, I am wordless. I only got to know you recently but I feel like I have known you for a long time. You have the kind of warmth and sweetness that old friends can instantly share no matter how long you have been apart. I was hoping to get to know you better in the future.

The first thing that comes to me is your happy face talking about how great fishing is. It totally made me want to try it. You told us we'd have to wait until spring when more fish come back to the Bay Area. Remember the time we got together for Fiona and Sooyoung’s pre-wedding party in San Francisco? The proof of your love for fishing was in what Cindy told us at the bar: you talk about digging worms for bait excitedly, you rarely had a catch and you'd come back smelly and dirty but so happy after fishing.

Once, Fiona and I ran into you at the farmer’s market. I heard you were a tomato connoisseur. You were with Cindy on a sunny Saturday in late summer at the Embarcadero Farmer’s Market.

I was watching you and Cindy dancing at Sooyoung and Fiona’s after-wedding party. I remember you two were just like how a perfect couple in love should be. You and Cindy are dancing in my memory.

We had dinner after you were discharged from your first hospital stay in January. Somehow Fiona, Gene and I were too lazy to go out to Tobin’s birthday party (because we drank a lot of wine and felt good and comfortable at home) but Sooyoung and you dragged us out.

Gene and I went to your 30th birthday party twice. Gene thought it was the week before. Gene complained how I always caused us to be late, so we rushed and drove like mad and got there on time. We only found that out after we got to the restaurant and called Sooyoung that it was the next week.

Steven, knowing you is a blessing. You will be remembered. Rest peacefully, and watch us from heaven.

-Mariko Yamamoto

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